XBIZ Awards: The Worst List

It is my experience is that porn people are the generally the worst. Here are Jimmy's WORST for 2017's XBIZ Awards.

Best Bridesmaid Dress Award

Looks like someone has just given the fuck up...

The Total Tool Award

We get it you're being "ironic", right? You owe Dustin Diamond a nickel because he was dressing like this in 1992 and he looked stupid too.

Best I'm Too Fat for this Outfit Award

Dammit, this an awards show not a tennis pro shop for the blind.

Best I Desperately Need Attention Award

Over compensate much for your lack of talent?

Best God Please Stop Award

Still fucking awful...

Best Supporting Total Tool Award

Abraham lives! So where is Negan and his precious Lucille when we need them?

Yeah, No Award

I'm not sure what the industrial structural integrity rating is for latex but this has to be close to its max. 

Does This Wall Make My Ass Look Big Award

And you thought the talent on the red carpet was bad...this came in through the service entrance.

Best Impression of a Fire Hydrant Award

It was difficult to keep the dogs from urinating on her.

Lifetime Achievement Completely Worthless Award

Best Newcomers Ready to Be Shit Out the Bottom of the Porn Biz Award

Sorry I don't know who these 3 are and I really can't be bothered to care.